Made to Run. Hate to Run.

            I really don't like to brag, but I have great running shoulders;  so my 7th grade PE teacher Mrs. Finley told me as I ran in third to last on our mile run.   Grabbing my shoulders, she arrested them with her eyes and declared, "Great running shoulders!"

            So every once in a while, when Won Bin and I chat with friends who are training for octathons or running to China daily, I meekly and modestly chime into the athletic conversation, "I've been told that I have great running shoulders."

            You would think that my husband would find great family pride in having a wife with shoulders that Marion Jones envies.  "My wife has shoulders who's blades are so quick that wind cannot resist them," he ought to be saying with his chest puffed out like a robin.           

            But instead, he argues, "There are no such thing as running shoulders.  You run with your legs and feet."

            Hands down, my husband is by far the more logical one in our relationship, but there are times like these, when his logic has a tint of pessimism, which in his defense, he renames as "realism".  I need to handle moments like these with the delicacy and tenderness that the Lord God given to me.  So in my mind, I plug my ears with two fingers and sing, "La! La! La!  Can't hear  you!" 

            Sometimes the kids like to mention that I'm incredibly slow and that they all run faster than I do.  Though it is true that all my kids ran faster than me by the time they were 8 years old, I'm still faster than my toddler Josiah!

            MAJOR FIST PUMP!

            Fact is, I haven't really done any real running since my last PE class in 9th grade.  After a while, it felt like I was running more for the comical relief of my friends than for exercise:

FRIEND1:  Christine, you do know that that facial expression will not make you go faster. 

FRIEND2:  If you multiply the amount of steps you take, it does not necessarily mean you'll go faster.

            So when people ask me if I play any sports, I answer, "Nothing with a ball or running."

            Then they exclaim, "Why that's every sport!"

            There are actually a lot of sports without a ball or running- such as skiing, ice skating, swimming, dancing, skateboarding, biking, gymnastics, wrestling, folding laundry, trying to get four kids in a car on time, playing card games, or teaching your teenager to drive. 

            For me, just thinking about teaching my teenager to drive makes my heart pump faster.  I'd say the exertion is equivalent to swimming 10 laps.

            But since I wouldn't want to waste the amazing physique of these heaven blessed running shoulders, I want to offer all my friends FREE photo ops with my excellent running shoulders.  Although I do have to warn you, you'll have to bring a camera with really fast shutter speed, because these shoulders are cheetah fast and all you might catch is a blur.